Monday, October 22, 2007

Does God have legs?

Upon reflecting on the creation stories of the Bible while sitting on the shitter (I had nothing to read at the time), more questions arose in me regarding the Christian God of the Bible. It is said that man was created "in the image of God". Did God have legs? I wondered this because he apparently had nothing to stand on for all eternity in the vastness of nothingness. Why would He need legs? He needn't walk anywhere. Why do we have legs? Why don't we have the ability to float or fly or 'exist' in our space? Now I can see the arms thing. You can say they were needed for 'creating', but I figure He could just do it with His mind or something.

Now my mind started to race to other things that I had never given thought to about the man/God physical relationship (no, not that kind of physical relationship!)

Why do we need to eat and drink to survive? Certainly there was no need for food or water for God to survive. He being the omniscient He is (supposed to be), He could save millions of the needless suffering people and children that starve to death, dehydration, food poisoning, etc.

Why do we need to breathe air to survive? God exists in space or nothingness. There is no atmosphere for God. Why do we need air to breathe so we can survive? Again, many needless deaths could have been avoided by those who suffocate, drown, or get lung cancer (smoking would not be an option if we needn't breathe, right?) And why did God create 75% of the Earth's surface water if we cannot survive in it as a natural environment?

Why do we require a person of the opposite sex (God seems to be male according to the Bible) to procreate? And how did God determine what a female would look like? He did not make the female in 'His' image, unless He has tits and a vagina (and a monthly penchant for being pissed off...hey, now that explains a lot of the evil God in the Old Testament!) But that would negate the whole "created man in His image" argument.

Speaking of procreation, why did we need to procreate? Why didn't God just make all of us. He made Adam (and Eve), so why not make everyone? That would save so many needless deaths from pregnancy complications, abortion, stillborns, etc. And it would not require sex, so rape would not exist (and homosexualism- since the Christian's seem to be so against it.)

Why do we require temperatures in the ~ 35F to 100F degree range to survive? God apparently needs no heat to survive. He exists in nothingness. How cold (or hot) is that? I would venture a guess of something like deep space with no sun for heat... pretty effing cold! How about creating a perfect planet with a balmy 72F all over, all year round? This would negate heatstroke, burning to death, frostbite, hypothermia, etc. Damn, this dude is starting to sound like a really sick bastard now.

I'm sure more will come to me, but I will need to eat a few burritos first to make it back to my 'thinking chair'.


DiVerL said...

And I bet he didn't have a bellybutton either....!

Harry Nads said...

Of course not. :)

Welcome to my blog!

King Aardvark said...

Ha, thinking chair. My uncle calls it "his office."

I wondered about the same thing, though my take is a little different.

Harry Nads said...


Welcome and thanks for the link to your post.

Infidel753 said...

This is an interesting point and one which I haven't seen made before. If man was created by God "in his own image", then that means that God has (and has had, throughout his whole eternal existence) a wide range of attributes which have no conceivable function in a perfect, transcendent, environment-independent being, but are only relevant to the imperfect and limited human creatures which that being would someday create. It is rather like a car claiming that Henry Ford must have been born with wheels.

As a description of the creator of the universe, this makes no logical sense. As an example of the kind of crude mythology which ignorant and malnutrition-befuddled tribesmen in the ancient Middle East might have come up with, it is quite plausible.

Your point about women is somewhat less telling, however. Abrahamic religions traditionally look upon the female half of our species as essentially another kind of domestic animal, and hardly human at all. These religions hold that man was made in God's image; the creation of woman was more like the creation of goats or sheep.

This point does not enhance the standing of those religions, to say the least.

You have an intriguing site here; thanks for creating it. You might also find mine of some interest.

Harry Nads said...


Thanks for the nice words and welcome. I will visit your site to see what you have to offer. :)

Tommy said...

Hi Harry.

That echoes what Neil Tyson points out to those who argue that the universe is "fine tuned" for life. No, it isn't. Most of the universe is hostile to human life, and so is most of the Earth too. It is only recently that we developed the capacity to sustain ourselves in hostile environments but it is still risky. Ask anyone who climbs Mount Everest.

Harry Nads said...

So true, Tommy.